Where Dreams Live…

Quarantine Diary Day 5

Today symptoms seem less serious than initial considering I have completed the first round of medication that doctor had prescribed, even though I have actually requested another round because I thought I might need more days to recover. This is also my first time to complete whole course of medication which I didn’t expect as I always have some ‘leftover’ in my medication. Considering how strong this virus is, I have also expected my test results to be still positive today, and hopefully will change to negative by tomorrow. I still might have some phlegm in my throat, but it does not has the swollen feeling as before.

My poor girl will still have to take her medicine till her cough is less persistent. She has been asking when she can go back to school as she doesn’t want to miss a day, especially tomorrow is her first oral exam of the year. She has been working hard for it yet the virus came at the wrong time. She may have more time to prepare now but will not able to take the exam together with her friends this time. She will have to take this alone. Good luck to her then.

I should get ready to clean the house tomorrow since my health is better and need to to get back to work soon, or clearing emails at the very least. Today shall be the last day to rest fully as I slept almost whole day for the first time still feeling drowsy despite I have the last drop of medicine to take.

My very hope is for my girl to recover fully so she can enjoy school as usual and this virus will be gone forever from our house and family. It was a torture for the first few days and that shall be our last experience on it. Thank you for visiting and we will not welcome ‘you’ again.

Quarantine Diary Day 4

There is a chinese saying, “祸不单行”, it means when trouble comes, there comes another. As I thought I was going to recover soon or at least self isolation for few more days, now my girl is also down with covid. Her symptoms are fever and cough.

We might have neglected how contagious this virus is so might have missed out some protective steps previously. We thought we have done all the precautions yet the virus still attacks us. No matter how strong your immune system seems to be, always better to be over protective than never.

Life has to go on, I am counting down to another 3 days and need to take care of my girl at least till her fever subsides. This is my first time finishing my medication and still not fully recovered. This shows how powerful the virus is. The side effects are what I am worried too. There are many rumours so we shall see which I might have fall into.

No pictures for today because need to remorse for the day. Thank you.

Quarantine Diary Day 3

If you are not aware, in my country, after 72 hours of self isolation, you can do a self-test to check if negative or positive. If test result is showing as negative, you are free from quarantine. But if the test result still shows positive, this means you have to continue to self-isolate till Day 7. After that, regardless your test results, you are free to go anywhere, that includes out of your house (this also provided you are fully vaccinated; otherwise need to wait till Day 14).

This morning, I woke up with swollen throat and coughing phlegm again. Not as struggle as yesterday but felt abit better today. However, this does not cover the fact that I am indeed still positive. Hence I will have to continue to self-isolate for another 4 days before I can meet the world. For all you know, I might not go out of my house if I am still positive, just to be safe from others too.

Being alone in a room these few days, trigger my writing thoughts and dreamt a lot (as the medicine makes me drowsy) but somehow my memory being wiped out when I woke up, so I can’t really remember what I dreamt too. Some people say after recovered from Covid, they tend to be forgetful, memory is not as good as before. I think it would be worst for me since my memory is already poor before getting this virus. That makes me wonder how I am down with this virus even though I have done so much precaution. Or maybe somewhere I have neglected to be careful from.

In any case, this shall be a lesson for me. I have to continue practising good washing habits and keeping a social distance. You never know when it will hit on you. By then, it would be too late to regret too.

Today is a home alone day because all are busy. I settled my own meals surprisingly and thus I did not take any photos of my meals today. The picture of today’s result is to remind myself, don’t assume that you would not get it. Think of how you can prevent it.

the two lines refer to positive just as if you are pregnant

Quarantine Diary Day 2

My day 2 is another torturous day because I have been coughing out phlegm which I assume virus in the phlegm. The throat is like swollen and felt painful when I swallowed plain water only. Luckily I still have appetite to eat but worried I might become fat after this quarantine period.

The medicine supposed to make me drowsy but somehow it is like making me to cough out phlegm and couldn’t really sleep well. Especially when I am lying down on bed, the phlegm just coming out itself. So is either cough or blow out by nose. I tried both ways but it seems the phlegm is non-stop.

Today afternoon I actually had ‘something’ accompany me which scared me off. The cockroach (or something like insect?) was crawling against the window wall, giving me some creeps. Hence I had to spray something before can let it go. It was a hectic afternoon.

Other than that, I am thankful that someone is there for me and still managed to cook meals for me. When he was quarantined, I didnt cook much but ordered food delivery much. Therefore, I am really appreciative on his actions. Thank You Love =)

Quarantine Diary Day 1

Today marks my first day to have known I have covid. It started off with dry cough and slight fever. But it didnt ‘wash’ away the virus despite I washed my hands often. When the time has come, it will happen and is inevitable. Not sure if consider lucky or blessed with the shots, maybe it does help a little that I don’t feel much of others said. And maybe because of dry coughing or the virus, i started coughing with phlegm. The doctor said I’m the first patient of positive case in his clinic today even though I do not want to be his first case. Hence, he gave me 7 days MC.

When I received the SMS from MOH, it further confirmed that I am positive, cannot run away. Since I am the positive patient, I am also entitled to collect ART kits (lesser than before but still good enough). Today’s protocol is self-isolate for 72hours. If test negative after that, I am free to go out but if still test positive, I will have to wait for Day 7 noon to officially go out. Fortunately, I still have time to tidy house and took whatever I need to my ‘quarantine’ room.

I wanted to write this down so I have somewhere to refer to when I recall how those days are. I don’t know if I can bear with days being alone in room but i told my family and friends that this is my entitled “me time”. Thankfully someone is here to handle my meals, and most importantly, he can cook, so there is no worries of not enough food.

Somehow I might have this virus, I actually ask him to buy bird’s nest for me to soothen my throat. If he remembers, he might get it during my quarantine days. (praying hard he remembers). I have not lost my taste yet but I can feel my throat is inflammed whenever I swallow saliva. I guess symptoms varies for people but there are still some similarity. Most importantly, don’t assume you won’t get it, it is more of monitor your health condition frequently and self-test if you have those symptoms. Do not hestitate to see doctor too if you are feeling very unwell. But for good practice, do a self test first before seeing the doctor and let the nurse know so they know how to handle.

I shall not say much as this is only Day 1, I still have many more days to write. Below is also my first cooked meal that satisfy my dinner.

找自己

每个人是不是到了一定的岁数就会迷失方向，不知道以后的路应该怎么走？人从婴儿出世后，除了哭闹不会说话到学着怎么爬，站然后走路。到了会走路的时候就开始学说话。第一句的“妈妈”或“爸爸”都会让父母感动吧。至少当我的格格第一次叫我的时候，我哭了。

开始上学了，第一天带她到幼儿园或小学都会很感动，也很舍不得。之后就是埋怨怎么要起得那么早。我意识到原来妈妈以前也曾经经历那些年，尤其我叛逆的时候。还好的是当时我外婆是陪伴我最多，最久的时候。她照顾我和两个妹妹得无微不至，我们很感恩。

说到年轻的我是多么渴望爱情。虽然父母其实也没怎么限制我回家的时间，但是我也知道一个女孩子就不应该往外跑。那时的我其实也没认识什么好男人，也不会看他们是好还是坏。所以，我就这样认识了三或四个所谓的男友。

他们教会我不同的东西。一个让我认识不同的音乐风格和打游戏；一个教我怎么给惊喜；还有一个给我尊敬就是不强迫我做任何事。最后一个教会我人情世故，怎么和人说对的话，他也是我现在的丈夫。是他让我看世面，学说术，再怎么和人相处然后打好关系。我所认识的朋友，同学，甚至同事，他都可以打成一片。

之后有了孩子又是不一样的体验。一直很感性的我开始了解妈妈的辛苦，看到任何关于孩子或妈妈的戏也会感同身受。孩子每天的成长，勾起我儿时的回忆。我很庆幸自己外婆带着我，教我说方言。也因如此，我也对语言感兴趣。但是现在自己的孩子连华文有些吃力，让我有些感叹。如果我能在她幼小时，多接触华文华语，也许现在的她比较喜欢华文。当然如果早知道，结果也未必你想象。

人老珠黄的意思大概知道，但是有多少是这样也未必。人是不是要趁年轻做自己想做的事呢？我曾经设了几个目标，就是在几岁前做什么。以为时间还多，机会一定会来，而现实偏偏不听使唤。像是去环游世界因为疫情计划得延迟。这个疫情来得有点巧，在2019年，我不知不觉去了不少国家，算是我出国最多次的一年。然后2020年之后，就没再出国了，只是在环游国内或宅度假(俗称staycation)。

今年生日原本想出国庆祝，想趁自己还有些胆量，做一次空中弹跳(俗称skydive)。毕竟自己也不年轻，这应该是给自己一个代表作。只是人算不如天算，疫情还没康复，我的生日出游记可能要等到下个大日子吧。而我就只能在国内找同类的来交差。我的生日愿望不能说，大家心照不宣啦。谢谢大家祝福。

完美拼图

佩佩，祝你二十二岁生日快乐。她拿起放在盘上的串串棒, 食物拼凑的二十二，好浪漫啊。大她十岁的男友，李总，是跨国公司的总监，每天都忙于工作，很少时间陪她。佩佩看到他用心准备的生日惊喜，已经很感动了。

原来他们在一起已经两年了。一开始朋友们不看好这对情侣因为岁数差太大了。而且李总一直都是很理性现实的人，怎么会和比他小又可爱的女生呢？之前几个女友都是成熟漂亮的淑女。佩佩刚好就是大咧咧的女孩子。也许就是她的天真活泼，开朗的性格吸引李总吧。

他们俩是在李总负责的一个活动里认识的。开始的时候，佩佩以为他在偷窥模特换衣服。原来李总只是在确保模特都换好了才准备走秀。而佩佩的工作是帮模特儿选衣服，算是服装顾问，只是还没得到认可。这场误会让他们更认识彼此的好。

佩佩有两个闺蜜，可欣和俊浩。可欣和佩佩从小一起在同所大学的宿舍认识才变好友。她们是在同个社团认识俊浩。他原本是gay但日子久了，觉得自己好像喜欢上佩佩，可是一直没敢告诉她。反而是可欣质问俊浩怎么不向佩佩表白，也许佩佩也喜欢他。但俊浩觉得与其不知道会不会有结果，不如做好朋友比较长久。俊浩就是不想失去佩佩这个好朋友。

李总本来有个被父母安排相亲的对象，然后差点订婚。千金小姐美琪一开始不愿接受父母安排相亲，但为了不用在公司上班只好先答应。美琪看到李总就一见钟情因为从来没有一个男人不对她好的。李总也不愿去相亲，本想以冷漠态度赶走对象，怎知美琪竟然喜欢上他！他们两家公司如果合作，应该会收获不少。李总对美琪没感兴趣只是想到公司可能面临倒闭只好妥协。最终因为受不了美琪的公主病，公司也慢慢开始好转，他提出解除婚约。美琪当然很生气，想威胁李总说她可以把李总家公司倒闭。李总反而拿出她之前一脚踏两船的证据说如果她父母知道的话，应该也凶多吉少。美琪答应李总不再惹他，但只求保持联络。

佩佩和李总的双方家长一开始也都不同意，尤其以李总的家世，应该找个门当户对的女孩，像之前美琪就是他们想找的媳妇。佩佩的父母则是怕李总是花花公子，对佩佩也许是玩玩而已。没想到他们俩的关系已经过了两年还是依然相爱，真是羡慕旁人。

佩佩喜欢海贼王除了他们有些糊涂搞笑，就是乐观，不怕困难。她就是想带欢乐给她所认识的人。李总看起来很酷但也很细心。他知道佩佩喜欢路飞，特地为了她亲手缝制一个路飞的洋娃娃。今天佩佩再向李总表白，重温当时他们是怎么在一起的。

会画画的小女孩

很久很久以前，山上住着一个小女孩，小爱。父母在她六岁的时候就不在了。她唯一的亲人是住在山下的爷爷，可是爷爷行动不方便，不能和她住，只好留她一人自己住。他拜托附近的邻居帮忙看着她，尤其是一日的三餐。小爱很懂事，自己会动手煮饭，烧几个菜也没问题，邻居都不需要怎么照顾。

小爱很喜欢画画，一有空就拿纸和笔画画。她最喜欢画自然，有时是山，有时是树，有时是小动物。这天，她画了一颗大树，树上有只小鸟。画着画着就睡着了。

门外突然有人敲门，“小女孩，可以给我一杯水吗？”小爱心想，不能随便开门，问了，“你是谁？” “我是你奶奶。” 小爱懵了，奶奶不是已经过世了吗？她听着声音感觉不像是坏人，就开了门看看。果然是个奶奶，可是不像是她的奶奶啊。她让老奶奶在门边的小凳子坐着，自己跑到厨房找水来。她小心翼翼地给老奶奶一杯水，老奶奶很快地喝完了，又和小爱讨水喝。小爱想着老奶奶应该是很渴了，立刻再拿一杯水。

老奶奶喝完水又向小爱讨水喝。小爱忍不住问，”老奶奶，天气很热吧，水还够吗？“ 老奶奶笑着说，”最后一杯就够了。” 可是当小爱从厨房回到门外，老奶奶不见了！她想可能老奶奶在赶路，急忙走了。于是，她回到房间想继续画画，可是树上的小鸟也不见了！

小爱在想是不是自己忘记画完小鸟还是还没画到？她就开始再画小鸟。可是画着画着又睡着了。门外又突然有人敲门，“小女孩，可以给我一杯水吗？”小爱问道，”“你是谁？” “我是你奶奶。” 小爱又懵了，奶奶怎么又回来了。可是她还是准备给老奶奶一杯水。正要开门时，奶奶怎么又不见了！

小爱再次回到房间，画纸里的小鸟也不见了！她很懊恼，为什么明明画了小鸟却又不见了。她怀疑那只小鸟是不是奶奶？所以她再画一次小鸟也告诉自己不要睡了，一边画画，一边打醒自己，就是怕睡着了小鸟就变奶奶了。

这次小爱终于完成了想画的画。有一颗树，树上有一只鸟，树下坐着老奶奶在乘凉。小爱不由自主地唱起歌来。唱到一半，门外突然又有敲门声。可是小爱还没问是谁就去开门。而这次是门外没有人，却只是一杯水在地上。小爱拿起了那杯水，没想到奶奶就站在她面前！奶奶的一句话，“你保重。”就消失了。小爱感动地哭了。

老和尚和小和尚

从前山上有一座庙，庙里住着一位老和尚和小和尚。小和尚从小就在庙里读书写字，打扫煮饭。当他六岁后，小和尚发现他已经读完了庙里的书，心想还有什么书没看过。

他在打扫老和尚的房间是，发现有个纸条写着，《学校记录》，他想学校是什么？于是他去找老和尚好奇地问，“什么是学校？”老和尚说，“山腰下有一所学校，你去看看就知道了。” 小和尚毫不犹豫地准备去学校的旅程要用的和吃的。和老和尚告别后就开始启程了。

他走到半路，有一片田地。田地有个农夫在收割。小和尚好奇地问农夫，“这个是什么？” “这是米啊。”农夫说。小和尚觉得和自己煮的长得不一样啊。农夫又说，“这是还没收割好的米呀。”小和尚抓着头，还是不明白。农夫让小和尚把他早上收割好的米给小和尚瞧瞧。果然是米啊！小和尚再问，怎么又一样了？”农夫笑着说，“这就是你每天煮的米呀！老和尚有时会和我买啊！”小和尚顺便问道，“这是去学校的方向吗？农夫点点头，指着对的方向。小和尚再次感谢农夫又继续旅程。

来到河边，觉得渴了，看到有个老奶奶在洗衣服。“我能喝水吗？”小和尚问。老奶奶微笑着说，可以。我在河的下方洗衣服，你在上方喝水没事的。”小和尚想确认学校方向，老奶奶说，“时候不早了，他们应该快放学了。”小和尚和老奶奶告别后，快步地走到学校。

好不容易到了门口，校工阻拦他问道，“你来学校有事吗？”“我想来学校看看。”

校长竟然是老和尚！

My Miracle Baby

If your race is a Chinese and married, you are most likely expected to have children of your own and have your own family. They also believe having sons will help carry bloodline of your family tree. I am not sure about other races and their culture, but having children after married seems to be normal routine. For my case, having baby or even pregnant is difficult during my early years of marriage.

When I first know that I was pregnant, I didn’t actually believe the first test results and had another method to confirm my pregnancy with the doctor. As the baby growing healthily inside my tummy, my usual sensitive nose and gastric were not recurring at all as before. I might not have any morning sickness or cravings to any food, all the diet and activities were as per normal as if she was absorbing all my ‘badness’ that had been haunting me.

The day I was having labour contractions, not sure if due to my pain threshold or my nervousness overcome the pain, I still had epidural (a kind of anaesthetic normally used when labour) and that relaxed the dilation process to be faster. However, I assumed she was too excited to see the world, the gynae recommend Caesarean instead of natural birth. So, this is how she was born to our world.

There are many things to learn as a new parent and there are many advisors from family, friends and social media. It’s quite hard to follow all advices we have received but sometimes you would need to judge it by yourself or follow your instinct. Apparently, it is what you do, the child will follow you, thats why they always say you should lead by example.

Ever since she knows how to talk, we often shared how she was born and how she is a miracle to us. Without her, we would not know what is family like and what is happiness to us. Without her, I might not know how to do many things. Today is her birthday. I just hope she would be always healthy and happy. She should know we love her too.

Happy Birthday to my girl. xoxo